Not Enough Physical Attraction?

Dear Hillie:

I have been dating a lovely man for the last three months, there are quite a few miles between us and although we have only met seven times we are in constant contact through emails, texts and calls; every day in fact, from the start. We have many shared values and interests and I like him very much – he is very keen on me. I just don’t yet feel much physical attraction. Actually, I’m not sure if my ‘radar’ is very sound because in the past I have felt lots of this with men who were not right for me and I think what I am now comparing to was just ‘lust’. Is it just early days do you think please, can this develop? I know that I am happy with how things are going and I want him in my life; maybe I am just a bit afraid of fully letting go? I would very much appreciate your advice.

Hillie says:

I’m pleased you have realised there has been a pattern in your love life. You have felt immediately attracted to and fell in lust with men who were not right for you. Many of us make this mistake and some never get enlightened as to what’s happening in their life. I think this relationship is worth pursuing; shared values and interests are a great starting point. The most successful relationships often start off as friendships and you must like him a great deal to be emailing, calling and texting him every day. Many people worry so much about what’s going to happen in the future that they forget to enjoy the present. You say this is early days so I suggest you enjoy this lovely friendship, forget about what the future may bring and just see what happens.