Age Difference

Dear Hillie:

I have just started an on-line relationship with a man twenty years younger than me; I’m 50 and he’s 30. He is pushing but I am running away even though we have known each other for almost a year. It’s not that I find him unattractive; he’s bright, intelligent and sometimes shy, has a wonderful sense of humour and can always make me laugh. It’s the age gap that’s worrying me. If our ages were reversed it would be perfect, however I feel society still doesn’t accept the older woman younger man relationship. Help! Please put me out of my misery and tell me what to do.

Hillie says:

It doesn’t matter what other people think. So long as you are happy and not harming anyone else, do what you want. However I must add a note of caution. In general the combination of an older woman with a younger man is not the best recipe for a long term relationship. For example when you are collecting your bus pass he will be in his prime of life. Also a man of 30 can still father children until extreme old age but a woman’s child bearing days will usually be over by the time she reaches 50. If you go into this relationship with no future expectations, just a determination to enjoy each moment together, then good luck to you.